Vickie Hoffman
Pictures and Content Courtesy of Vickie Hoffman
Wrestling is More than a Sport; It is a Brotherhood
I am a mom of 6, four boys and two girls. Growing up My kids played many different sports during their youth, and then the boys were introduced to wrestling. If you have been around wrestling even just a little, there’s a good chance you have heard a famous quote that says, “Once You Have Wrestled, Everything Else In Life Is Easy” How true that is!
The boys had gone to two, maybe three practices, when they were asked to attend a tournament, I knew nothing about the sport. I mean nothing. I didn’t know there was a Leotard thingy they had to wear! I didn’t know the terminology; I mean who would have thought a sport had its own language, and it only consisted of a few phrases like, “take down, that’s two, get your head out, get behind him and stalling.” I had no idea how to score points or how to win! We just went with it and hoped we would figure it all out.
I walked into that first tournament having no clue that this was about to change our lives, for many years to come. My first thought was, “Wow, this is intense!” There was so much yelling from the stands, I honestly felt overwhelmed. There were kids laughing, and lots of kids crying! What was I thinking bringing three of my four boys to this place, but here we were, and it was time for my oldest son to wrestle his first match. I looked across to try to find his opponent. All I saw was this boy that had muscles on top of his muscles jumping around in the other corner! I honestly felt like a horrible parent at that point. I was about to get my son’s butt whooped on by this kid they called Ray Waters. The match was over before I could even take my first breath, and I was so happy to see my son walk off the mat on his own two feet. It was the scariest 5 seconds of my life, but had to watch it again, with my next two younger children. I could not wait for the day to be over. I was a nervous wreck.
After the tournament, all three boys said they had such a great time. I was in shock! They just got the snot kicked out of them, and they loved it? Little did I know that wrestling was going to be the new lifestyle for the Temple-Hoffman family. We spent nearly 15 years in the sport of wrestling. The first year we wrestled all local tournaments. The boys were getting better and won about half of their matches. I started noticing they had more success after every loss. I could see they were falling in love with this sport, and so was I. Near the end of the season Coach Mac, someone that had been helping direct me throughout the year with all my questions and concerns, told me that I had to get the boys traveling if they wanted to get better. I listened, and the very next year we started to travel. By year three, we were a committed wrestling family. The boys were wrestling year-round, and we were traveling all over the west coast. We were watching the boys get better and better–not only on the mat but off the mat as well.
I saw so much passion; they obviously they liked to win, but they LOVED to compete. I watched as their confidence level grew; they had total belief in themselves. For example we went to a scrimmage, I believe it was January 2008 right before our youngest son Jeremy turned four; a wrestler from another team called him out to scrimmage–the kid was 8! Before I could say yes or no, Jeremy was putting on his head gear ready to go! The kid, being twice his age, made no difference to him! He had the confidence on his side, and it worked to his advantage, Jeremy won the match!
My boys did not fall into negativity; they could tune out the naysayers. We were at a tournament in Temecula California, the competition was extremely tough, my son Jared had a match coming up that many people may have already counted as a loss–John Scarpati was a tough kid, but I also knew Jared was just as tough. Jared stepped on the mat with full confidence; I saw no fear! He was ready to wrestle. Another lesson taught from wrestling; you can do anything that you believe you can do! At that very moment he believed he could beat Scarpati, and he did. Jared walked away with the victory that day. They were all so focused and the work they put in the classroom followed suit.
Wrestling became so much a part of our lives; our family vacations were now wrestling vacations. We would plan our vacation around our wrestling destinations. We were building friendships with the other families in the wrestling community and making some fun amazing memories along the way. Over the next decade we would literally travel the world watching the boys compete in local, national, and European tournaments. Wrestling became more of their life rather than just a sport. They put so much hard work and dedication in trying to get better. I remember seeing my son Josh writing down his goals. He was told by his H.S coach, Jon Ferry, that this would help him have a clearer vision of what he wanted, and he would have a better chance of accomplishing those goals. I believe it worked! Josh was so coachable–he listened, he visualized what he wanted, he wrote it down, and he accomplished his goal of becoming a state champion that very next year.
As a parent watching from the sidelines, I saw it all. I felt it all! I felt the pain of every loss, and the victory of every win. I laughed with them and cried with them. I hugged them when they needed it, and gave them space when they just wanted to be left alone. Wrestling has created a bond in our family like I believe no other sport could have done. It has brought people into our lives that we will forever cherish. Parents that became friends, friends that became our family, and teammates that became brothers. I will be the first to admit, we are a different breed. Wrestlers and their families are just a different breed. As much as you cheer for your favorite wrestler, as a wrestling fan, you feel the pain from the defeated wrestler. You know the amount of work that they have put in to get that hand raised at the end.
I have witnessed so many great attributes that wrestling has taught my family. It has taught passion. It has taught them to have grit and determination. They have learned to be resilient when things don’t always go as planned. In wrestling, and in life, you bounce back and you never give up. It has taught them courage! When my oldest son was going through cancer treatments I saw him replace his fear, with faith. He said to me, “Once You Have Wrestled, Everything Else In Life Is Easy.” It was at that point I saw the impact wrestling had on us! At that point I knew, it was going to be a hard match, but he would prevail! It had been embedded into his brain to fight, and continue to fight, and to never give up! From our youth coaches through middle school, to the parents that stood in our corner, and of course our selfless high school coaching staff, WE THANK YOU! We thank you for all the countless hours you have given, and the life lessons that you have taught. We will forever be grateful.